Attending

Attending means listening with your body, showing physically that you are giving your full attention to what the other person is saying. Attending is also being in control of your body so that it doesn’t interfere with your interaction with the other person (not fidgeting, not encroaching on the other person’s space, not laughing nervously when you are uncomfortable, etc.). or in cases where you cannot control your body (yawning, etc.) acknowledging to the other person what is happening and letting them know that you are still interested in what they are saying. Listening carefully is important. It is difficult to push out inner distractions or outside interruptions, but it is important for good listening.

Some basic behaviors of physical attending are:

F facing the other person squarely
I inclining the upper part of your body slightly toward the other person to show an interest
R looking relaxed and natural or acknowledging to the other person that you are not feeling relaxed, and the reasons for that
E Maintaining good eye contact
D Maintaining a comfortable distance
O Keeping an open posture
G Using gestures that highlight your words