By Connor Zahler
Around most sports towns, the coming of a new season heralds joy and optimism. Maybe this year will be the year! And the 2023-2024 Season has given Detroit fans some much-needed, long-awaited, success and excitement. We all know the Lions gave us one for the ages this year, even if they did not win it all (a topic for a future blog), and the Red Wings are not yet counted out to make the playoffs.
But the news is not so good across every sport, and history shows being a Detroit sports fan has been a rough road for a long time. In fact, as sports journalist Rodger Sherman recently found, Detroit is on track to own the worst season in each of the big four American sports since 2000. In this article, we’ll go through Detroit’s 21st century Hall of Lame, as well as what’s happened since.
THE 2003 TIGERS: A STRIPED TRAINWRECK
With a 43-119 record (.265 winning percentage), the 2003 Detroit Tigers team lost the most games a baseball team has ever lost. The pitching rotation was ice cold, giving up an average of 5.3 runs in every nine innings. Batters didn’t do much better, notching a .240 batting average (almost .20 below the league average). The next worst team in the league won 20 more games. There’s not too much to say here: with a lackluster roster that never seemed to put it together, the Tigers put together the worst MLB season of the 21st century—debatably ever.
In the next few years, the Tigers would see a resurgence. Anchored by legends like Miguel Cabrera and Justin Verlander, the Tigers went to the playoffs every year from 2011 to 2014, even reaching a World Series (although they were unceremoniously swept in four games). Within a few years, though, the Tigers crashed back to earth, as the team lost its appetite for huge spending and big stars moved on. As of 2023, the Tigers are a proud part of the worst division in the MLB. With some up-and-coming young players and shoddy competition, though, they might not be too far from at least a winning season.
THE 2019-2020 RED WINGS: WHEELS FALLING OFF
The Red Wings are Detroit’s most storied sports team, with 11 Stanley Cup wins (two Canadian teams have more, but that’s cheating). With great highs, though, comes horrible lows. From 2019-2020, the Wings posted a 17-49-5 record (.275 win percentage). They might have lost even more if not COVID ending the season prematurely. To be fair, it wasn’t all on the Wings: it was Steve Yzerman’s first as GM, and the team was plagued by injuries. Still, though, this was an absolute stinker of a season.
Given that this season was so far in the past, not too much has changed for the Red Wings, but the future certainly seems brighter. The Wings have gotten better every year since 2020, and it would be hard to ever get bad enough to only win 17 games again. Right now, they’re solidly middle of the pack.
THE 2008 LIONS: THE PAPER BAG SEASON
In contrast to the Red Wings, the Lions are Detroit’s least storied sports team. Since the creation of the NFL, they’ve ran off more generational talents than they’ve won playoff games (2 to 1). Even in a history marked by losses, some stand out. In 2008, the Lions did not win a game. They posted the first 0-16 season ever, a feat that would only be matched by the equally infamous Cleveland Browns a few years later. Per game, they allowed almost twice as many points as they scored (32.3 vs 16.8). Fans took to the time-honored tradition of covering their faces with paper bags at games to hide their shame. There’s nothing good to say about this season. At least the other two teams won games!
Since 2008, the Lions have been a mixed bag. They drafted quarterback Matthew Stafford in 2008 and even squeezed some playoff appearances out of him, but there were still no wins. Following a trade that sent Stafford to greener pastures, the Lions have built one of the most intimidating offenses in the league and—for the first time—even clinched their division, the NFC North. In 2024, the Lions will chase their first playoff win since 1991. Let’s hope they get there.
THE PISTONS, RIGHT NOW: 5 FREE WINGS
Not content to be left out, the Pistons decided this year to get in on the action. As of now, the Pistons record stands at 8-49, for an incredible .148 winning percentage. Although there’s more basketball to play, and seem to be trending upward from rock bottom, they’ve already set the single-season losing streak record. While Detroit has young stars, and have even taken juggernauts like the Boston Celtics to overtime, the team is prone to stretches where they just don’t score points. To add insult to injury, Wingstop created a promo that gives Pistons fans five free wings with every win. Clearly, a lot of wings are being left on the table.
The season is still going on, so there’s nothing to say about the future of the Pistons as of now. They could bring in some big pieces and develop their young guys, or they could languish in the pits for the foreseeable future. Either way, it seems that it’s the Pistons turn to be the reason Detroit sports fans have to hang their heads in shame.